Benchwarmers for A Cycle

There is a downside to having responded so well to the gonal-f last cycle.. Though no one told me about it until today. I went in to my RE’s office today for a baseline ultrasound so I can get this next show on the road. While the dildo cam was all up in my business the NP started telling me about this said response. I have 8 huge cysts on my right ovary and must sit this cycle out. What a bummer! Oh well, what can ya do, right? This just gives my husband and I a time out which is cool though I am more of a get up and go girl. I’m sure my second boss will be delighted to hear that it is in fact not really over! Lol. I hope everyone is having a great day!
Love,
V

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I’m Gonna Get Fired

Y’all!  My boss is going to fire me.. no doubt.  I hope not really but I’m sure she’s pissed right now.  I am going in tomorrow for my baseline ultrasound and to pick up meds and my RE is not around the corner, he is 2 1/2 hours away and my other job is 1 hour in the other direction.  I have two jobs at this point in time, just to make some extra money and because I have a lot of days off with my fulltime job.  The boss I speak of is at my second job or my PRN (as needed) job.  Don’t forget, I’m a nurse.  I sign up at this other hospital whenever I want and when they have openings, (which they have tons right now ) my only requirement is that I work a 12 hr weekend shift and a 12 hr weekday shift.  I have already fullfilled my requirements for the month but since I started in June I have had to call out 4 times!!!  I hate putting her in that position in thinking she is fully staffed and then having to call out.  I try to let them know as soon as possible but the best I can do is just a days notice.  She is completely aware of what I’m having to go do, however it still doesn’t staff her floor.  Oh well, right?  Ah!  I HATE INFERTILITY!!!

Love,

V

And It all Came Crashing Down

Today it all came crashing down.  I was hoping wholeheartedly that this cycle was the one.  I have been testing daily to see that the trigger shot was completely gone.  The line was not gone until this morning.  Since the line never went completely away I let myself think that instead of disappearing, the line would get very light then grow dark again because of my own HCG.  No such luck.  The strip was stark white this morning.  I lost it.  Today is the 12th day past ovulation, it should be showing up a little by now.  Then I got another confirmation this afternoon, I started spotting, it’s still light brown/pink and hasn’t hit full flow yet but I know it’s coming.  I lost it again.  I let my husband hold me while I bawled my eyes out and told him I didn’t want to do this anymore.  I have been so strong, not stressed, no crying too much, until today.  Today was a bad day.  He told me he would support whatever decision I made.  We do still have one more IUI that is covered by insurance, earlier today I was willing to let that IUI rot in a gutter before I did this again.  I have since calmed down and decided to try ONE MORE TIME.  Hey, what’s another $600 down the drain for meds, right?  It could be the one, but I’m doubtful.  I have run out of optimism.  That’s where you guys come in.  You guys can be optimistic for me.  I am tired of being optimistic.  I hope everyone else is having a better day.  I’m about to sit down and drink a beer over dinner with my wonderful husband who is so supportive and loving.  He’s a pretty good cook too! 🙂

Love,

V

Wonderful Wondofo

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The line is almost gone! Since this was my first cycle with gonadatropins and trigger, I wanted to test out the trigger shot. This might be my ever only positive test! These Wondofos are kind of awesome because they are so cheap, I feel zero guilt in wasting them! I intend to continue testing daily because I still have lots of tests left, you guys can’t talk me out of it! 🙂
On another note, I went to our downtown area to pick up my husband’s fantasy football league trophy (nerd alert) and there was this cutesy store called the Picket Fence going out of business and has everything 50% off, of course I went in to browse! They sell stuff like home decoration, baby gifts, Vera Bradley, Brighton jewelry, just a bunch of random stuff and I came across this crib that they have been using for display. It was only $50!!! It was exactly what I want to use! It was a dark cherry spindle crib. I would’ve bought it right then if 1. I had a vehicle big enough to put it in 2. If my husband wouldn’tve divorced me for bringing a crib home when we aren’t even preggers 3. If I had a prepared fib for when the sales lady would have said ” congrats, when are you due?” I did however tell my hubby about it and he said we could go get it as soon as we got a real positive test. Hopefully it will still be there in a week! ( see my positive thinking right there?)
Peace out.
Love,
V

BOOBS

So this might be as close to pregnant as I can get.  I can’t imagine what you IVFers feel like after taking all of that medicine!  I am painfully aware of my ovaries with every step I take and it’s been 4 days since my last dose of Gonal-f.  My belly is poking out as if there is already a baby cookin’ in there and these BOOBS!  My goodness gracious they are sore!  If I have ever thought they were sore before I was WAY wrong!  NOW I know!

I hope everyone had a great day!

Love,

V

Trigger tonight

Hello All!

I haven’t written in a while because there hasn’t really been anything going on other than my gonal-f injections.  I took my daily dose of gonal-f for the last six days and went today for an ultrasound to see how big my follies were.  There were SIX that were from 16mm – 18mm!  Yay!  I’ll trigger tonight and go in for our IUI on Wednesday morning.  I’m excited.  I hope this one sticks!

I hope everyone is having a great Monday!

Love,

V